Saturday, March 11, 2006

Gum anyone?

So this past week I finally bit the bullet and went to the periodontist to take care of the start of gum disease. Much fun was had by all. Actually, she was great. Very personable; even offered to call me at home that eve to ensure I was okay. So now three days later, I'm sitting with packed gums on my upper left and brushing and rinsing three times a day just doesn't seem to kill the death of my breath because I can't touch the packed side. It's fortunate that I can't smell my breath however I am offending my household. For that I have apologized constantly.

Unfortunately this is something I'll, er...they will be suffering until next Wednesday when I go back to check on the stitching and healing etc.

Then after the month passes I'll be able to get prepped for my crown which seems to have started this whole process in the first place. UGH! I swear I'm not a sickly person, as I was just telling my partner the other day. But something happened in the last year where I am just falling to pieces and quite frankly I'm sooo over it! Put me in a bit of a funk last few days. To walk around with butt breath has me feeling so beyond less than attractive. I can't kiss or even offer dirty talk due to previous mention of breath. I've just felt utterly useless lately.

I've gone through bouts of this before where I feel like a bit of a failure and just not stepping up to the plate or under acheiving for lack of effort. I just can't shake it though...just feel like I'm not doing what I'm suppose to be doing, whatever that is. She thinks I need to get a hobby or do something that will help me become more fulfilled and it would be cool to take a class or something but I really don't have the time or energy to put into it. So I am at a loss, at least for the time being. Which of course just adds to the, "dumb ass go do something with yourself," feeling.

A few months ago I thought about joining a local women's choir. It's once a week that I am actually available to attend, it's not costly to cover expenses involved, they hold concerts at festivals, events, etc. Be great to be active and do something I enjoyed WAAAYY ago as a teen and just have some fun and get to know some people. But the whole committing to attending (can't have more than 3 absences a year) feel like another chore or responsibility. Who needs that?

I attended a book club a few years back and LOVED it. But it's also clear across town and the person who organized it switched hands, content changed a little, and overall just didn't hit the mark for me any longer. It would be great to start another near my home; I wonder how many would participate - I would find that so much fun and it might actually get my butt reading again like I used to. Still haven't finished Fingersmith and Water's new book is released in a couple, no less than a couple of weeks from now. Good thing I 'm back at work tonight. Maybe I'll be able to bust it out this week. LOL!

Well, I've rambled on long enough. Think I'm just going to figure out how I can offer time and maybe start something of my own that isn't too involved or committed; like a red hat ladies club for the thirty-something crowd but without the red hats?! I don't know, I'll fill you's in when I figure it out.


Anonymous said...

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DrM2B said...

???on the last comment ...LOL
anywho... I'm down with whatever U decide....perhaps a movie club?...less demand for reading..and we could go out after as a group and "discuss". Hey..I know.. a Shoot em up club! LOL