Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Where's Doc Spock when you need a good book?!

According to this article, we are on the path of raising (more) spoiled, demanding adults. And after reading it, they're right. One person speaks of 16 year old girls with french manicures and professional blond highlights, not to forget the Coach handbag, Razor cell phone, and J. Choo shoes. This is your typical teenager in 90210...no? This is your typical teenage girl in any high school across the country. Boys are no different. Between the sneakers at $100 + a pop, Guess or Abercrombie clothes, high end electronic toys...you name it...and no one is working folks. These kids drive all day and party all night and due average at best in school and don't worry about who's footing the bill because mom and dad take care of it all.

Who is going to take care of them when they do enter the real world? Assuming not everyone has the inheritence of good ol' Tori Spelling, eventually they will have to do their own dirty work. How will they relate to eachother in relationships with each one expecting the other to dote after them?

The article also mentions some MTV shows. Has anyone seen My Super Sweet 16 ??? This is a gross display of teenage girls you just want to walk up to and slap back to yes ma'am and no sir. They really need a Super Sweet Ass kickin'. Obnoxious and rude and whiny and grossly embarassing.

We already live in an impatient society. Broadband is too slow, microwaves take forever, the fast food line or DRIVE THRU make us crazy...not to mention credit card debt. We are a fast-paced, give it to me know society and we're making the next generation even worse. That's scary! I am guilty of it myself; if I want it I go and get it.

So of course I took this a step further and thought of my own household. Am I providing TOO much for the kids. The two teens have cell phones. However, the phones are more for our convenience than theirs so I don't sweat too much on that one; the flat monthly rate and base phone cost, I still feel safe. For clothes, again we check out clearance racks and shop for sales and on rare occasion "splurge" for the name brand shoes or whatever when we see it on sale or reduced. Again, I feel like we're still on the right path.

Last year the 15 year old (then 14) wanted the Ipod because (you know) everyone has one. She has an MP3 player that is never used but wanted the Ipod. We talked about it and as much as we would have liked to get it we said no. If she wanted it bad enough, between b-day money and Christmas money, she could get it herself. She never bought it. So now I'm feeling pretty arrogant with myself - like yea, I'm a great parenting role model, yada yada.

However, everytime we go to the store I reach for something to bring home for them. When I am out with one or two and they want something I don't think twice about putting it in the cart. Granted I'm not getting them Blackberry's or anything but I like to shop so I buy them stuff they may not need or even want. Is it everything? No, they're a far cry from being lavished upon like a Hilton. But do they "work" for stuff...not really - at least not consistantly or substantially.

As far as the older two when they reach their driving years, we thought it only right they get a part time job (so long as school grades maintain) to cover their insurance and gas. We'll let them use the car to come and go (which is paid for) but they need to be responsible for their costs. Once you taste that freedom, it's the best incentive for maintaining good grades and a job to continue providing it, right?

Their are no manuals on the perfect parent; a lot of opinions in books but nothing concrete. Guess the outcome 20 years later is the final and their are no retakes. So, we'll have to wait and see.

1 comment:

DrM2B said...

Great post..... coming from money...I can tell U...I still had to do "chores"(created slavelike tasks around the house) to get money to buy something I wanted but didnt need...i.e. speedskates.

Yes, my parents couldve bought anything for me that I asked for.... but the lesson here is that as an adult I manage my money VERY well ....I learned this thru scrubbing the shower tile for 5 dollars....emtying the garage,sweeping, and putting it all back for 2 or 3 dollars ...etc. I think by spoiling children, adults dont teach then any survival skills when they get out into the real world....(U know who I am talkin about here!)